Belisi: How to play Matchmaker
Research done by Engage.com shows that half of all marriages are the result of someone introducing the couple. Maybe you have a buddy or a girlfriend who is perpetually single—they just can’t find the “one”. You feel guilty excluding them from couples-only affairs and just as guilty when you do invite them and they clearly feel like they’re the odd one out. Or, maybe you have a friend who gladly crashes your date nights with your significant other and you have an inkling they’d be a lot happier with an SO of his own.
Great introductions are generally a result of a matchmaker’s (i.e., that’s you) instincts about a potential love match. Want to watch sparks fly? Do your single pals a favor and throw a party in their honor. Instead of setting up uncomfortable “blind” dates, bring together possible love matches for a no-strings cocktail party. Follow these tips from Chief Matchmaker for Engage.com Trish McDermott for a better success rate.
Great matchmakers are good listeners
Before making an introduction ask about the background, personality, lifestyle and relationship goals of both people. Singles are creatures of habit, so be sure to learn about what has (and hasn’t) worked in past relationships.
Let your instincts guide you
When matchmakers say they have a “sense” two people belong together, they see something special that goes beyond basic compatibility factors like age, location and relationship goals. While facts are important for qualifying matches, your personal instincts and insights are the added touch that may forever change someone’s life.
Look for key similarities, but remember opposites can sometimes attract too
Most people connect best with someone who has similar values, beliefs and life goals—someone who has shared and can understand some of their more significant life experiences. Great matchmakers know that people don’t need to be clones of each other to experience chemistry or be compatible over the long term, which explains why artists sometimes fall in love with accountants, or Republicans can feel great chemistry for Democrats. Here are a few areas where similarities generally work:
- level of physical attraction
- relationship and family goals
- intelligence
- attitudes about one’s life purpose and religious or spiritual beliefs
Sell your introduction
Sometimes singles need a friendly nudge. If you strongly believe that magic will happen when two people meet, do your best to convince each of them that meeting the other might change their life. Great matchmakers must occasionally be great salespeople too.
Follow up and hone your craft
With practice, your matchmaking skills will develop over time. Stay connected to the singles you’ve introduced at your party to learn which introductions worked and didn’t work, and why. Then don’t be afraid to try something (or someone) a little different at the next party.
~A. Covington for Belisi Fashions
Raghu on Mar 23, 2009 2:22:51 AM:
Good Material